Comments on: Religious holidays without the religion? http://catnamedpig.com/2009/04/14/religious-holidays-without-the-religion/ confessions of a lapsed perfectionist Mon, 23 Aug 2010 02:15:47 -0500 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.8.4 hourly 1 By: Amy http://catnamedpig.com/2009/04/14/religious-holidays-without-the-religion/comment-page-1/#comment-1148 Amy Wed, 15 Apr 2009 23:14:29 +0000 http://catnamedpig.com/2009/04/14/religious-holidays-without-the-religion/#comment-1148 Yes - I have seen the disrespect flow both ways too - and I make sure I do not particpate. It gets on my nerves to no end to hear religous people pull that crap - and I have trouble understanding how people think that is what God would want them to do. I strive to be open-minded - and I plan to raise my kids to do the same. Yes – I have seen the disrespect flow both ways too – and I make sure I do not particpate. It gets on my nerves to no end to hear religous people pull that crap – and I have trouble understanding how people think that is what God would want them to do. I strive to be open-minded – and I plan to raise my kids to do the same.

]]> By: Laura http://catnamedpig.com/2009/04/14/religious-holidays-without-the-religion/comment-page-1/#comment-1147 Laura Wed, 15 Apr 2009 20:10:35 +0000 http://catnamedpig.com/2009/04/14/religious-holidays-without-the-religion/#comment-1147 P.S. Am not trying to be pompous -- that stuff about my how-to book is clearly meant to be a joke. I don't pretend to have all the answers here -- just sharing what we have done so far and some of the reasoning behind. Also, my hope in writing this was to hear what others think -- please weigh in, if you're reading! P.S. Am not trying to be pompous — that stuff about my how-to book is clearly meant to be a joke. I don’t pretend to have all the answers here — just sharing what we have done so far and some of the reasoning behind. Also, my hope in writing this was to hear what others think — please weigh in, if you’re reading!

]]> By: Laura http://catnamedpig.com/2009/04/14/religious-holidays-without-the-religion/comment-page-1/#comment-1146 Laura Wed, 15 Apr 2009 20:07:34 +0000 http://catnamedpig.com/2009/04/14/religious-holidays-without-the-religion/#comment-1146 Amy - I'm glad you think our approach sounds respectful. Having seen the disrespect flow both ways (religious people telling non-religious people that they are wrong/damned/have no morals, and non-religious people mocking religious people for being credulous or ignorant or just kind of dorky), it is a big deal to me that my kids never make another person feel bad about their beliefs. I hope if Matt and I seem positive and enthusiastic about what other people are doing, the kids will learn to appreciate and respect all different traditions. Sara - good point: it's not just parents who can have different religious beliefs, but other family members/role models. In Chapter 4 of my how-to book or bullet point 7 of my leaflet, I would say the situation with your parents gives you a good opportunity for Avery to learn first-hand the importance of tolerance. She will grow up watching people she loves make very different choices about religion. Yet she will see that your family members still love each other even if they disagree, and she will see how important it is to be respectful of everyone's choices. Amy – I’m glad you think our approach sounds respectful. Having seen the disrespect flow both ways (religious people telling non-religious people that they are wrong/damned/have no morals, and non-religious people mocking religious people for being credulous or ignorant or just kind of dorky), it is a big deal to me that my kids never make another person feel bad about their beliefs. I hope if Matt and I seem positive and enthusiastic about what other people are doing, the kids will learn to appreciate and respect all different traditions.

Sara – good point: it’s not just parents who can have different religious beliefs, but other family members/role models. In Chapter 4 of my how-to book or bullet point 7 of my leaflet, I would say the situation with your parents gives you a good opportunity for Avery to learn first-hand the importance of tolerance. She will grow up watching people she loves make very different choices about religion. Yet she will see that your family members still love each other even if they disagree, and she will see how important it is to be respectful of everyone’s choices.

]]> By: sara http://catnamedpig.com/2009/04/14/religious-holidays-without-the-religion/comment-page-1/#comment-1145 sara Wed, 15 Apr 2009 16:39:28 +0000 http://catnamedpig.com/2009/04/14/religious-holidays-without-the-religion/#comment-1145 A stick situation -- when the grandparents are religious, but the parents are not. We run into this issue at each holiday; sometimes we let Avery go to church with her grandparents and we listen we she relays what she has "learned" from Granny about Jesus and how important it is to pray (or when a night time phone call to Granny ends with Granny saying "Don't forget to say your prayers tonight" - and we don't pray in our house). I think you and Matt have taken a really great approach... and perhaps you should write some sort of "how to" book. A leaflet even? No? Just blog posts? Ok. A stick situation — when the grandparents are religious, but the parents are not. We run into this issue at each holiday; sometimes we let Avery go to church with her grandparents and we listen we she relays what she has “learned” from Granny about Jesus and how important it is to pray (or when a night time phone call to Granny ends with Granny saying “Don’t forget to say your prayers tonight” – and we don’t pray in our house).

I think you and Matt have taken a really great approach… and perhaps you should write some sort of “how to” book. A leaflet even? No? Just blog posts? Ok.

]]> By: Amy http://catnamedpig.com/2009/04/14/religious-holidays-without-the-religion/comment-page-1/#comment-1143 Amy Tue, 14 Apr 2009 23:46:57 +0000 http://catnamedpig.com/2009/04/14/religious-holidays-without-the-religion/#comment-1143 OK - I'll bite. I think what you're doing sounds respectful. I appreciate this sentence - "When we talk about Jesus, we describe him as a great teacher and leader, who emphasized peace and love." I can appreciate that not everyone shares my beliefs. But I respect their beliefs - so I want to be respected in turn. What bothers me is when my brother announces on Christmas eve how deluded we all are and how Jesus was a sham. That is not respectful. But you are not doing that - you are being respectful. And I don't think the Easter bunny or Santa Clause have anything to do with the religious aspects of the holidays, so I figure the more the merrier when it comes to that. So, to sum up, I think you are doing a good job - by teaching your children to respect diverse points of view - which is what all parents, religious or not, should do. OK – I’ll bite. I think what you’re doing sounds respectful. I appreciate this sentence –

“When we talk about Jesus, we describe him as a great teacher and leader, who emphasized peace and love.”

I can appreciate that not everyone shares my beliefs. But I respect their beliefs – so I want to be respected in turn. What bothers me is when my brother announces on Christmas eve how deluded we all are and how Jesus was a sham. That is not respectful. But you are not doing that – you are being respectful.

And I don’t think the Easter bunny or Santa Clause have anything to do with the religious aspects of the holidays, so I figure the more the merrier when it comes to that.

So, to sum up, I think you are doing a good job – by teaching your children to respect diverse points of view – which is what all parents, religious or not, should do.

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