cat named pig

Oh, hi. It’s you, Blog. What — you want some attention from me? Sorry, Blog — not gonna happen anytime soon. Because preschool is over, you see, and music class is over. Swimming lessons are ending, and summer camps haven’t started yet.You might be wondering, Blog, what any of this has to do with you and the lack of attention you’ve seen lately.

Well, here’s the thing: I have no attention to give you. No attention to give my cat, my husband, my house, or my eyebrows (which could use some tweezing). No attention left to give because it has all been used up. All of it. All of my attention is being sucked into an endless vacuum of “HEY MAMA.” “GUESS WHAT, MAMA?” And, if I leave the room, “MOOOOOOOOOOMMMMM!”  All uttered in a four-year-old voice imitating a drunken British football hooligan bellowing obscenities at the opposing team.

And whenever there’s a pause in the stream of “Hey MAMAs,” it’s not because I am enjoying a minute to focus on whatever I need to focus on (e-mail, scheduling doctor’s appointments, thirty seconds with the tweezers and a mirror). No. It’s because the “Hey MAMAs” have been temporarily replaced with a bunch of “NOOOOOOOOOO — it’s MIIIIIIIIIIIIINEs” that make my ears bleed and whatever’s left of my sanity dive headfirst out the nearest plate glass window.

In other words, we miss preschool.

We miss the outlet for some of Siena’s physical and emotional energy. We miss the nap times where Elliot slept while Siena was at school, and the house was quiet for ninety gorgeous minutes of the day. We even miss the hustle and bustle of trying to get to preschool on time (I never thought I’d say that, but it’s true). Without preschool to break up the day, all we have is non-stop bickering, complaints of “boredom” in toy-strewn rooms, a stream of chatter that rarely ceases and grows increasingly angry-sounding if not responded to immediately.

Elliot has ratcheted up the intensity of his demands for attention too — whether as a natural expression of his two-year-old-ness or because he feels the need to compete with Siena. Either way, it means that every second they are not fighting, someone is asking me for something. Loudly.

So Blog, until you can get in my face and literally shout for my attention, you’re not going to get much of it. You can ask Pig how she’s coping. Oh, yeah, and do we still have a fish?